2 weeks ago, I was thinking about how I’ve had beautiful conversations with people, mostly people in passing or strangers.

I also get the ‘I like talking to you’ or ‘you’re easy to talk to’ compliment and it just made me think about what makes a conversation with someone memorable.

I’m not someone you’d classify as social but I do what I have to do at all times to get by. When I tell my friends that I don’t know how to socialize, a few of them tell me I’m actually good at striking a conversation with a stranger and I think that’s weird because I don’t see myself that way.

Anywho, I love conversations, especially those ones that leave you feeling connected. I can’t sustain small talks for long but I can try because let’s me honest, small talks are necessary and they make good conversation starters.

I’ll be sharing 5 characteristics of a memorable conversation or someone who is memorable in my opinion.

#1 The person sees and hears you

People love to be seen and heard. It makes them feel like someone gets them or at least tries to. Everyone loves validation, some more than others and showing someone you hear and see them by attentively listening to them, makes them feel validated, it makes them feel good and it makes you look trustworthy.

Being observant has made me attentive and I get to notice micro expressions of people. It’s weird but sometimes I feel what they are feeling (good or bad). I think that has helped me when having conversations with people because I listen (except I’m distracted inwardly, which happens).

Also, I realized that, conversations I found memorable are those ones where the person heard and saw me. I didn’t have to say a lot but they understood or at least, let me express myself.

#2 The person gives you the liberty to show yourself—they allow you

Everyone wants to be able to be free without feeling judged or misunderstood. I don’t think we truly show ourselves to everyone. We show a part of ourselves to people. Everyone to an extent is trying to behave and conform (I dunno how to explain it but I hope you get it).

Sometimes you meet a stranger and you’re free to be yourself, maybe because the stranger doesn’t know you. So you talk, express yourself, sometimes unburden and you leave feeling like you’re light and happy.

Such conversations are memorable, not for anything but the fact that you were free enough to talk, act, and express yourself.

#3 The person is open and relatable

We also tag a conversation as memorable when the other party is open with you. Maybe they talk about things you normally wouldn’t share with someone.

You could also find the conversation with this person memorable if they talk about things that are relatable, especially if it’s something specifically related to you.

#4 Their vibes

Sometimes, you’re just attracted to people’s vibes and so their conversations with you become memorable.

I believe everyone has a uniqueness to them that could be worth remembering to people.

#5 The little things

Little things like remembering your name, pronouncing your name right, eye contact, body language, uniqueness and eccentricities of a person can make your conversations with them memorable.

Sometimes, it’s just the little things.

If you want people to remember you, especially with the conversations you have with them, you can try actively listening to them, validating them, giving them the liberty to be free with you, being open and relatable, and little things like remembering their names and pronouncing it correctly, making eye contacts, etc.

Above all, don’t try to be someone else so it seems you’re interesting. Just be yourself but improve where you have to.

If you’re not a good listener, it’s a good idea to listen more. If you’re overly judgmental, it’s good to reduce that a bit and try to understand people.

This doesn’t mean you support and encourage what’s wrong, no. I’m trying to say you should approach them with love, Jesus would want that.

Don’t try to be someone you’re not. You’re you for a reason, use it to your advantage.